A Still Season.
For the last few months I’ve been struggling to find the words to type. I’ve wanted so desperately to give you guys some spiritual encouragement. Truth is I haven't been in the best place mentally; certainly not a place to write or give words of advice. I haven’t been in any sort of deep depression or anything, but I’ve been in a very still season in life. Accomplishing goals, but still still. Networking, meeting moguls, but still… still! I’ve been frustrated with where God has me, and hesitant to share that frustration. But if we’re honest, still seasons are common to us all and the frustrations are no stranger to any of us either.
me to me: “I need to finish this blog… but I’m stuck…”
*A FEW WEEKS LA-TER*
#GodIGetIt-I love when I’m able to give y’all good ole Bible, so let’s get into it! As my readers know, I have been battling with anxiety for a few years, and as those who share this with me know, it comes in spells. I find myself doing really really well, and then it all comes crashing down-and for what? Usually some situation I’ve created in my mind, that’s not likely to happen anyway..
This last spell seemed to hit a little harder than normal, but per usual God was intentional in His ways. Last night, I sat on my patio, as I always do before bed. It’s my time to talk to God and reflect on my day. There was a certain stillness that existed tonight that was not normal. The clouds were still, the sky was clear, and the Houston highways nearby that were usually filled with sirens, were silent. Even more, my mind was clear, my thoughts were still. Of course there’s nothing like the pure bliss of peace, so I kept reciting to myself- “peace be still.” Now, as common as that scripture is, I really knew more about what it meant in the context of a Madea movie, than what the Word actually said. In 2021, I’m aiming to be much more intentional and move with a sense of urgency in terms of my Bible reading, so what better time than now to read a chapter. Here’s what I learned-in Matthew 8:23-27, God sleeps peacefully through a storm. Matthew wakes Him up, like, “What You gone do? It’s crazy outside.” And God replies, “You ain’t got no faith, in ME?” That’s laughable, so God calms the storm-with a single phrase— “peace be still.” Instantly, it all made sense to me. That God is in control, of it all. That my worrying is laughable to God. In times of chaos and anxiety spells, peace must be still.
Ironically enough, before last night I had been working on a new blog forever-”A Still Szn.” When I started this blog entry, I was planning on sharing my thoughts about being stuck, feeling like I had hit a wall in life. I got a start, then stopped, started, stopped; I was stuck, still. I couldn’t figure out what more I could say about such a “blah” season of life. Writer’s block had me by the neck, or so I thought. What I know now is that sometimes we have to be still in order to hear from God. Still seasons are seasons to give thanks for where we are, where we’ve come from, and how far we are going. To be still, in His presence, is to experience peace. Everything, and I do mean everything, is intentional. If you are in your season of feeling like you should be doing more or in a different stage of life all together, be reminded of God’s intentionality! He has us where we are for a reason. There’s something to be learned at every level! And let me just say that once it’s revealed, it’s like unlocking a new level on Mario Nintendo. This revelation alone rids me of the worry anxiety has to bring during any of her future spells. I welcome a new season!
Furthermore, in the midst of chaos I can now be reminded, God has it under control. And who am I to question Him? And while that’s sometimes easier said than done, “PEACE BE STILL!” I hope that in your next still season you are reminded of Matthew 8:23-27;God slept through the storm!
-kNicole<3
